Caffeine. Glorious, and awful caffeine.
After thinking about why I shouldn't have any more caffeine in my system, I decided to list a few tell-tale signs that you should quit.
A few signs that you should give up caffeine (or at least cut back):
- You can't function without it. Driving to work. Paperwork at the office. Afternoon Errands.
- If you can't sleep at night, but crash in the afternoon. If you're unable to fall asleep at night, it's probably because you consumed too much coffee all day. The worst part is when you crash in the afternoon, you need a pick-me-up... this is not a good idea.
- If you need a fix so badly, that you drink straight from the pot. Do I need to elaborate? No. If you're drinking straight from the coffee pot, it's time to back up.
- When you start taking your shots of espresso in the classiest way you can. I shoot my espresso the same way I shoot my tequila. Quick, I make a disgusted face, and then chase it with something. When you start raising your pinky while you sip your espresso, yeahhh you should probably just go ahead and stop. I may or may not have gotten to this point.
- If you're getting heart palpitations. Seriously. Just quit. If you're starting to get heart palpitations from all the caffeine, it's your body's way of telling you to CALM DOWN.. So don't drink another sip of that coffee, espresso, diet coke, or RedBull.
If you need coffee just to be able to function and perform these tasks, it might be time to check yourself.
And now, because I have absolutely zero caffeine in my system, excuse me while I go pass out.